Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Moose Have Birthdays Too

Hi all!  I know I haven't posted for a while.  I really REALLY enjoyed taking a break.  Posting every night was getting a bit tedious for me, and I think the content was starting to suffer because of it.  

I decided to post tonight for several reasons.  First of all, my friend Mark, aka wassamatta u, has started posting to his Boxers 'n' Briefs blog after more than three years and a lot of chiding from his friends, including me.  (Warning: his blog contains a copious amount of puns. And also letterboxing references, which you may not understand if you don't letterbox.  But mostly beware of the puns.)  So I figured if he could start posting again after being laz...ummm...busy for that long, I could start again after a comparably brief month and a half.  Second, it is Mark's birthday today. I decided that it was as good a time as any to post a couple of cards that he sent to me.  And to explain to everyone how insulted I was to receive said cards.

One day, a couple of months ago, I came home from work and checked to see if I had any mail in my mailbox, as I so often do.  I was pleased to see that I had several postcards, including this one:

California - The Stinking Rose, San Francisco

Hmmm...interesting.  Here is the message that was written on the back:

"I saw this postcard and thought of you!  Not because you are stinky.  Or because you look like the picture or anything.  But because it was a postcard.  And free."

Ummm, excuse me? It's a free card, so you thought of me?  What am I, some sort of cheap postcard slut?  *shaking head*  Of course, I chastised wassa vehemently for this.  He apologized, and I thought the matter was settled.  Until a few days later, when I received this....

California - The Dead Fish, Crockett

This one says:

"I saw this postcard, and thought of you.  Hmm...this is sounding strangely familiar...  Anyway, enjoy!


Enjoy?  Really??  First he basically calls me a cheap slut, and then he tells me that a dead fish makes him think of me?  I never thought I could be so insulted by something as seemingly innocuous as a postcard.  And then he has the audacity to demand, in ALL CAPS no less, that I post the cards on my blog?  How RUDE!  As you might expect, I gave him another earful.  Or eyeful, as I was typing on the computer rather than using my voice.  Hopefully between that, and the tremendous shame he is sure to feel when he realizes that the entire world (or at least the dozen or so people that read this blog) are now aware of his offense, he will think twice before putting pen to postcard again!

FYI for those of you who are just interested in the postcards and could not care less about wassa's affont, The Stinking Rose Restaurant is in San Francisco, California, and The Dead Fish is in Crockett, California.

But seriously, wassa, I am very glad to call you my friend, and I hope you had a extraordinarily joyous birthday.  And I really do appreciate the postcards.  Mostly.  ;)